November 3, 2011

I get horrible dreams. Blood drenched night gowns, Nightmares on Elm St. Usually waking up to satisfaction, my nightmares don't scare me anymore, but actually amuse me. I've gone beyond getting afraid and wonder more why they are occurring.

One week before I went through a transition of realizing what I needed for myself. There were many things that have pointed to me that I needed to find myself situated with different people. People around you affect you so much, that it is so important that you hang out with people who make you the happiest; you can be. One week before I went through that transition, I had a scarring dream. Hung from the ceiling. I could see my face, the pain I was being caused. My white dress began to soak up blood as familiar faces stabbed into my young flesh. Causing me to bleed out, then they began to heal the wounds. Knelling next to me, leaning towards me; pressing their lips against where they have stabbed. I woke up and felt like someone had knocked my teeth out of something with a message. Someone had literally thrown a rock at my head with a note attached saying, stop hanging out with these people. All they are going to do is hurt you and try to make up for it. I've literally never been happier since.

Last night, I dreamt the world was being taken over by zombies. It's probably just my mind being possess by all of the horror movies I watch before I go to bed. I don't know why, but I feel that it could be something else though. Maybe I fear the end of the world. I shouldn't though, since I'm not afraid of death. I was in a boat house, I had just left my sister to go hide in this room. I don't know why, but I knew that that would be the last time we would be together. And then before I even had the chance to go and tell her to follow me, I saw the living dead walking towards her. I turned my head and locked the door, as more followed and started to bang on the door. Thinking they were going to break the glass door, I forced myself into the boat, not knowing anything. I attempted to back out of the boat house and try to escape. I don't know what that would even mean. All I know is that I left my sister behind.

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